Wednesday, September 30, 2009

Forever is like a really long time.

At 6 am this morning while I was sitting on my stairs looking across the street at Carries house, waiting to see her and Sawyer (aka sweetest dog EVAH) walk out so we can meet up for our daily morning walk. I realized really for the first time that this is my life now. That I'm never going to be one of those people that doesn't have to work out to keep weight off. I'm going to have to workout for the rest of my life.

I mean, I've walked every day since May 18th except for one day last week (I twisted my ankle the night before so I took a day of ) and I enjoy walking but...but...the last few mornings have been FRICKIN FREEEEEEEEEEZING!!! My bed has never been more comfy and warm then it has the past few days. I don't wanna get out of bed any more, plus the days have been cooling off, it hasn't been as sunny and I feel like hybernating. This has never been so hard. I need to come up with new motivation. Right now, I get up every morning because I don't want to be the one to say "let's not walk today" and I know Carrie feels the same way. But it's frickin COLD!!! and it's really hard to keep that motivation going when compared to how much I dislike being cold. Maybe I should move...

To top things off, since I twisted my ankle I'm not even walking half of what I have been...actually let me go back a little farther. We had been walking 5 miles a day then because of business and other things getting in the way, a little over a month ago we stoped our evening walks so we were only walking 2 1/2 miles a day and that is when my weight loss stopped.... Now since my ankle is still hurting, we're walking even less then 2 1/2 miles plus we're not doing OMG It Burns because I can't do hills right now....AND this week I've gained 2 lbs. I'm frustrated. I was ok with maintaining...I never once thought that this was going to be an easy process for me, I expected to lose, then maintain then lose then maintain but this week has really put me over the edge. I need to come up with new goals and a new 12 week program to get me motivated and going again. I just hate feeling like I'm starting over, but with my new injury, I have to start all over doing less then what I was...sooo annoying.

So for the next few days I'm gonna think about what my new plan will be and I know you gize are super interested in knowing what I'm gonna do so no worries....I'll let you know....your welcome.

Monday, September 28, 2009

I know I know....

2 posts in a weeks worth of time...it's...it's unbelievable....I know. I just felt bad for leaving you hanging wondering if I actually spied...well I didn't. I really wish I would have now.

This picture says it all.

He said it was AWESOME!!! Then proceeded to tell me what food and drinks they had and how quickly the Oreos were eaten. (doyee)

Two of his friends talked him into asking a girl to dance (EEEEEEEEEEEEEK ::Kicking myself for not spying::). He asked his friend that's a girl. They waited for a smooth ::snicker:: song. ::still kicking myself::

After he danced with her, he was plum warn out so he called me to come pick him up. On our way home he asked if he could go to another school dance. Next time I'm TOTALLY spying!

Friday, September 25, 2009

Yesterday I was 20 and today...

I'm old enough to have a 7th grader go to his first school dance. I don't think I can take the pain.

It hurts.

(ignore my post workout hair and face)

Someone stop me from sneaking to the school and spying.

The only thing that is keeping me home is our conversation before he left.

Jackson: (with a really excited voice) Can I go to the dance tonight?
Me: (trying not to look panicked) UMMMMMMMM....(freaking out) ummmmm

Me: Are you gonna dance?
Jackson: I don't know how.

Me: Are you gonna ask girls to dance?
Jackson: haha no
In My Head: Oh thank God!

Me: Are you gonna ask your friends that are girls to dance?
Jackson: (High pitch HA HA) Not gonna happen.

Me: Why do you wanna go?
Jackson: I think it'll be fun.

In My Head: There is no freakin way I'm old enough for this!!!
Me: Ok...you can go...I guess...
In My Head: :: screaming NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO...etc::
Jackson: YES! with arm motions

Me: ::sitting here pulling out all my gray hairs because I'm not old enough for this::

Hey you!

Yeah, I'm talking you!

I'm still here.

Just in case you were worried.

Update coming...once I decide to walk up 2 flights of stairs and grab my iphone thingy so I can downloads pictures and stuff...so it probably won't be today.

Tuesday, September 8, 2009

I thought I'd be happier

I've seen the back to school commercials where the mothers are waving their children off to school all happy and excited. I fell for it gizes. I really thought I'd be way more excited today... The First Day of School. But no. It's all I can do to keep myself together today. I was nervous all weekend then last night, I maybe slept for 2 hours. I'm on the verge of crying and throwing up.

Jackson jumped on his bike and rode to school this morning, like no big deal. That's what I love about Jackson, he might not like it but he never complains about going. It might have something to do with his Aspergers but whatever it is...I like it.


Sara informed me this morning that she didn't want me to take her to her classroom and that she would take the lunch money check to the cafeteria because it would be weird to have her mom in the school. I cried a little, not in front of her...that wouldn't be cool. This is her first day in public school, she's been homeschooled k-through 3rd and for some reason she's really old today. Luckily, as we pulled up to the front of the school she changed her mind so I parked and ran excitedly to the front door so I could walk with her to her room. It's the little things gize, that make me happy. She was the most excited about going to school until the very moment I dropped her off in front, then she became nervous, but knowing Sara, she's going to have a good day....but I'm going to be sick to my stomach till it's time to pick her up. Maybe I'm a little over protective but...

Emily doesn't technically start today. She get's to have 1 hour sample Kindy today then starts on Friday. It's going to be torture!!! She is really excited...a little nervous but more excited and I think it's going to be hard that it's only half day and that she won't be going again till Friday. Even worse, she doesn't start till 12:15 so she has all morning to torture me about what time it is and when are we going to the school.

Hyrum is just plain freaking out. He's screaming "I want to go to school!" except he's crying so hard that it sounds more like a crazy person rantings. Poor guy...I hope he doesn't keep this up the rest of the year.